my grandma is in a coma with pneumonia

[the 2nd james]

Even though i don’t know any of you, i have sad news my grandma is in a coma with pneumonia and it is likely she will die very soon as they have given up trying to save her, this is the first member of my family who is going to die, apart from animals in the past.

At first i felt quite distant, almost like it was surreal after finding out today, but only tonight i have realised how sad it is, especially seeing her in the bed quite helpless and her husband who is quite a hard and emotionless man very emotional, who else has lost their grand parents and how did you feel? Or what did you do about it? It seems like there is nothing you can do to help.

I only saw her last weekend and she was fine, it makes you think about how quickly life can turn around and how insignificant things like sporting teams are although some of you may disagree.

[sevengoals]

I'm really sorry to hear about your grand mother.
If you get the chance you can tell her how you feel about her.
Even if you think she can't hear you it will be good.

[shinAUFC]

I lost my grand father 2 years ago ( wow time flies! )

It was particularly hard, more like losing a father, as growing up i spent ever holiday and long weekend i had away from school with him by my own choice all the way until i finished highschool and then dropped in on him at least 2 time a week from then on . So to say we were close was an understatement.

It is very hard watching someone who you saw as a figure of strength so helpless.

Anything you need to say to them regardless if they are conscious of what your saying then do so would be my advice.

Im quite similar to you in that i had never really lost anyone in my family apart from when i was quite young. So i often wondered how id handle it when the inevitable happened. I think you will suprise yourself.

It is not easy, but i found a whole new perspective on things from that and you probably will to. Its a time you will probably find/confirm who your "genuine" family members are also as i did.

All the best

[General Ashnak]

I lost both of my Grandfathers when I was in my teens and my wife's Grandfather paseed away in the last 5 years.

I agree with you about how sureal an experience it is, I coped with my Grandfathers deaths by getting drunk - but that was an age thing and a reasult of them living in Ireland so I had no method of spending time with them in the lead up.

I can only suggest that you spend some time with her and your Grandfather, and an extremely important thing to do will be to spend time with your Grandfather if she passes on. It is very common for men to give up on life after their wifes die so help him to know that there are people who care about him.

[Shane]

Sorry to hear about your Grandmother. The most important thing is to not isolate yourself completely. Try to keep your mind off things if you can and spend time with her even though she's in a coma.